I Might Hate You More…

Last week I went with my daughter Brittany to see War Horse. Brittany told Caleb after, “If a person can watch that movie and not be moved, something is wrong with them.” This wont be a spoiler, but there is one line I want to share with you.

The dad, a share cropper of sorts, goes to town to buy a plow horse for the farm, but while there gets in a bidding war over, not a plow horse, but a running horse. In the heat of the moment, he bids far more than he can afford. It will likely bankrupt his family. His wife asks him, “What have you done to this family?”

Their son assures his mom that he can make this race horse into a farm horse and he does his best to make it so. But when another failure comes and things look bleak, the old father sits in tears by the fire, he looks up at his wife and asks her. “Will you stop loving me?” She looks at him with compassion and says, “I might hate you more…but I will never love you less.”

Our lives are always a mixture of the love/hate relationships. It might be how we love the Cowboys and hate them at the same time. It might be a political leader that we admire for many things, who fails us in one area that brings us to hate him, though we love him. It might be the elders of a church that we love and yet we see them act as cold and uncaring as Ebenezer Scrooge on a bad day. If you haven’t had your own child scream, “I hate you!” well my friend–its coming. And that spouse that you love may from time to time do or say things that make you hate him. But it doesn’t mean there’s no love there.

Sometimes spouses and kids do hate with the absence of love. But often, it is the pain of the moment, the atmosphere of the relationship that drives the emotion of hate while love stands back and watches with eyes of hope. That little girl hopes you will understand. That boy longs for you to say I’m sorry. That wife lies there and begs in her heart for a kind touch. That husband prays for a day of peace. And when we don’t understand, refuse to listen, withhold a loving touch and walk into another war zone—then we hate again.

Something strange has happened to hate. It became the “H” word. I dare say you can drop the “F-Bomb” with less reaction in most settings than you get if say the word “hate.” There’s nothing wrong with hate. The Old Book says, “Hate what is evil.” The problem is we’ve lost ability to define evil for what it is. All hate is not the same just as all love is not the same. I love Mexican food, but I wouldn’t marry an enchilada. I hate spinach, but I don’t call it names when I see it at the grocery store.

When actions are evil, when they hurt and do damage to lives and to our souls, I think its alright to hate that. Not the people you understand, but what is happening. So if, on occasion, the people of your scene cause you grief and pain by the things they say and do, understand that its alright that you might just feel as the old wife did…“I might hate you more…but I will never love you less.”

telemicus out

3 Responses to I Might Hate You More…

  1. Josh says:

    This is great, and perfect timing! Fate? Maybe…

  2. Bill says:

    Wow! Welcome back Mike, God gave you those skills for a reason I am so glad you brought them back to light because I needed to hear that!

  3. cindy smith says:

    well done. good message. glad your writing again!

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